Dear Secret Law of the Universe,
When I weighed myself this morning I found that I’m nearly 3 pounds more what I weighed in January. What happened? Was it the mindless snacking? Not enough of exercise? Water retention? All the above? I was mildly shocked but instead of planning to exercise more I decided that the best method to lose that extra weight was… to wish for the extra pounds to melt away. Not only that, I asked the powers of the secret law of the universe to reduce my weight by tonight.
At about 6pm, I had a funny feeling in my stomach and at 8pm I started having a bout of explosive diarrhoea that lasted for nearly 3 hours.
While groaning in pain in the the bathroom, I actually made time to appreciate your wicked sense of humour. Yes, I asked for this, yes, you granted my wish, and yes, you did it before the end of the day. When I weighed myself again just before the stroke of midnight, I was indeed 3 pounds lesser than I was in the morning. Very well done.
If you don’t mind, please automatically include the following addendum to all the wishes I’ve made and will make in the future:
- No one is hurt — physically, mentally, spiritually or any other means possible– in the process of granting the wishes (and that includes me!);
- The wishes are granted through means that are legally-, morally-, environmentally-, ethically-correct;
In return, I will do my best to:
- remember to be grateful for all the wishes granted (lest I forget, I’d appreciate it if I’m reminded gently) and
- have patience for the wishes that will be granted — I’m sure you’ve not forgotten my Macbook Air wish in January ;)
For that, I’d like to thank you for today’s lesson: be careful what you wish for — it might get your bum burned.
Tomorrow, I’m going for a 2km run! :)